Retirement mission of the no-see-ums

12-10-21, Green Turtle Cay, Bahamas

We made it to Green Turtle Cay and Ron checked up is. Customs is interesting – always so much paperwork. I guess they believe the world has way too many trees?

Anyway, I was worried that in my new retirement I would not find my purpose and find myself being bored and needing work to entertain myself once again. Well, I now know this not to be true. I have found my new purpose. I am going to single-handedly get a grant from the Gates Foundation to eradicate the no-see-ums from my boat permanently. A lofty goal but one I think is well worth pursuing since Ron and I participated in an involuntary blood drive last night while sitting outside. They are just like mosquitos being small flying, biting nuisances. Now I have not yet worked in the part about the carrying disease that kills people part but am still working on that. Stay tuned.

Ron has decided, they are specifically targeting him and him alone. Picture this, when I come out of the shower this morning, I find Ron hunkered down under the kitchen table waving a small yellow plastic butterfly. Explanation is needed here in that the butterfly is a sticky gnat trapping device we bought in the apartment when we had an issue with drain flies due to the water damage. It seems as if they have driven him to a state of paranoia and somehow, he believes hiding under the table will save him from these little buggers. Now mind you he is wearing a bright orange, floral Hawaiian shirt. I am certain they are not after that and they would much rather the small yellow butterfly – right? Well he was not 100% successful in his WWII mission of the flies but he made a respectable first showing.

During our blood drive last night, we got to listen to the Green Turtle Cay Singer from the club house while sitting on our deck which was lovely and why we stayed out. This provided enough entertainment that I knocked two items off my bucket list already. #1) I have now heard the Reggae version of “Stairway to Heaven”. Now how many folks can say that? 2) Reggae Polka – check. Man, at this pace – I won’t have a list left after the first two weeks here. We hope to explore a bit of the island today so I can hardly wait.

The last noteworthy items was people here actually say phrases like “smack the donkey.” So, we are barely here in green turtle cay and already I have heard a multitude of firsts for me like Somehow “smack the donkey” that one is going to stick. Boy this travel thing is going to be quite an education for me.

For the record, putting barbecue sauce on burnt vegetables is not the same as jerk or Cajun. Ron’s still learning the temperature gage on our new grill.